To Go On Living

On September 9, 2004, a car bomb exploded in front of the Australian Embassy in Kuningan, Jakarta, killing nine and injuring almost 200 people. But the bomb didn’t only claim its victims from those who were actually nearby when the explosion happened, nor was physical injury its only damage. Some people said they were shocked by the images of the tragedy shown on TV over and over again. And quite a few claim that now they are traumatized by the tragedy.

But is it really trauma? What is trauma, actually? Is it normal to experience it? And by the way, what is normal under the circumstances?

Traumatic Events

A trumatic event is an event that is experienced as shocking and painful, causing a stress level beyond what we normally tolerate. Events like these usually happen all of a sudden and beyond one’s control, and often of the type that might pun human lives in danger, for example the sudden death of a loved family member, a rape, a miscariage, traffic accident, an earthquake, fire, a flood, and also a bomb blast like the ones happening in Indonesia recently, among others. The stress reaction that a person experiences after these events is called traumatic stress, or often simply called trauma.

Signs of Traumatic Stress

There are a number of signs that tell whether a person is experiencing traumatic stress. Remember that people might react differently to any kind of circumstances. So it’s entirely possible for people to actually suffer from trauma even though they don’t show all of the following symptoms:

· Repeated memory of the events, or more precisely images repeating themselves over and over in the person’s mind. For some people, it might seem as if the tragedy is happening all over again. They might also feel distresses if faced with anything that might remind them of the event, for instance something that they see, hear, feel, smell, or sense on the skin.

· Difficulty controlling emotions, especially in relation with the overwhelming experience.

· Reactions that were not typical of the person before the traumatic event, such as becoming easily sad, or easily angry, wanting to cry, being fearful, feeling guilty, helpless or misunderstood.

· A tendency to isolate oneself from others and avoid getting out of the house as often as before.

· Nervousness and anxiety.

· Intense alertness and an overprotective attitude toward oneself and loved ones.

· Having difficulty sleeping and having nightmares.

· Eating problems (appetite loss or increase)

· Inability to concentrate.

A Natural Reaction

How to handle traumatic stress

· Realize that most of your reactions are normal, especially within 6-8 weeks after the incident, considering that what happened was an extraordinary, shocking, and bad incident.

· Accept your feelings, including perhaps sadness, guilt, etc., as part of your healing process. Don’t pretend that everything‘s OK.

· After you think you are ready, talk about your feelings to people you can trust. They can be family members, close friends, or if you want a psychologists.

· Don’t avoid your family, friends and other people around you. Accept the support they offer.

· Do thing that you enjoy and can help you relax, such as listening to music, yoga, relaxation, taking a holiday trip to nice a place, etc.

· Keep fit, for example by eating nutritious foods, getting enough sleep, and doing light exercises regularly.

· If you don’t feel better after around 6-8 weeks, seek profesional help to help you deal with your experience.

It is quite normal to experience these signs for six to eight weeks after the traumatic event. Usually, the intensity of these symptoms will decrease over time. If they remain intense or become even more complicated after 6-8 weeks, then it is better to seek professional help from a psychologist, a counselor, or a psychiatrist.

Traumatic stress is a normal response. People who are deeply affected by tragic events are not crazy. The important thing is dealing with these reactions in a healthy way. It’s also important to remember that people have the ability to naturally cope with and survive difficult experiences.

A Helping Hand

Do’s and don’ts of helping your loved ones get through a trauma

Do’s

· Make time to listen

· Accept them just the way they are

· Be patient

· Show that you understand that they need time to recover

· If necessary, help them have some time to rest and pull thenselves together. For instance: if the person is your mom, you might try to help more often with the household chores

· Give supportive gentle touches, for example, when they are shaking or are afraid.

Don’ts

· Don’t talk too much or give too much advice

· Don’t ask them to repeatedly talk about the details of the incident and don’t be insentive to their feelings at the moment

· Don’t give them false and unrealistic hopes, when the reality might not be as cheerful. For instance, don’t life if there is a posibility that they will have a permanent disability because of their injuries

· Don’t blame them if they seem different after the incident

· Don’t show too much pity

· Don’t avoid or reject them because they’ve changed. (C’nS Volume 4 No.27)

You can also contact Yayasan PULIH at their hotline number 6221-719-7476 or fax your questions to 719-5444 (every week days from 9:00-17:00) or 70791304 (every day from 07:00-22.00), or email them at pulih@cbn.net.id You can also visit institute at Jl. Kemang III/8A, Jakarta Selatan 12730 Indonesia.